How Do You Listen? Part 2
by Sharon Eakes
A profound insight into good listening comes from the deaf. Bruno Kahne, a senior consultant at Airbusiness Academy, was developing a leadership program for Airbus. There he met an executive whose youngest son was born without hearing. Through this connection, Kahne became familiar with the culture of the deaf, their visual, intensely expressive language. He realized that many deaf people have developed communication skills more thoroughly than hearing people, which made them uncommonly effective at getting their point across.
In a radical experiment, he began using deaf people as communication consultants for corporate clients. Some of the simple, but oft-ignored lessons for good listening that came from the deaf are:
- Look people in the eye.
- Don't interrupt.
- Say what you mean, as simply as possible.
- When you don't understand something, ask.
- Stay focused.
Coaching Questions
- How often do you listen as recommended above?
- How do you pay more attention to the other person than to the voices in your own head?
- How do you listen to what is not being said?
- In what spirit do you listen? (To get an answer? To learn? To argue?)
- What can you decide not to listen to? (The news? Gossip? Advertising? Your negative, inner voice?)
- To what person in your life do you feel moved to listen more fully?
Sharon Eakes is a personal and executive coach and chair of the Pegasus Communications board of directors. You can subscribe to her free monthly "mini e-zine," Fresh Views.